It's Not Even Scary Anymore Mansion | Saturday Evening

[robinonadderall]

Stiles had absolutely no idea why Derek participated in his strange bonding activities--Flying Monkeys could have been considered abuse--but he wasn't about to complain. Derek was no Scott but it was still nice to have someone to watch horrible movies with. Making sarcastic comments to yourself was just sad.

The movie he picked this week was a Netflix suggestion after Stiles had been adding bad movies to the queue. Rodeo clowns and drug dealing conspiracies, it seemed like a must watch.

He had managed to not catch the popcorn on fire (a miracle in its own right) and was already hogging the couch even before the movie started. He had to claim his territory. Even if this wasn't his house.

[For Derek and anybody else who wants to stop by and watch a horrible movie about angsty rodeo clowns]

Comments

[robinonadderall]

"You answered that pretty fast," Stiles noted. "Should be I be looking for porn featuring you?"

[justlurkinghere]

"No." He was going to destroy your laptop. Because that would help.

[robinonadderall]

"Uh huh." He was going to find those pictures. And make one his phone background. "Why don't you wear more basketball shorts and knee high socks? Clearly you can pull it off."

Because this guy looks exactly like you, Derek.

[justlurkinghere]

He didn't dress like a fratboy, thank you.

"Why don't you shut up and give me the popcorn?"s

[robinonadderall]

Stiles grabbed a handful of popcorn and threw it at Derek. "You're being kind of a girl about that broken arm, man."

He was not letting this go.

[justlurkinghere]

"For the last time, that's not me." A beat. "And have you ever broken your arm?"

DEREK HAD. SCOTT'S.

[robinonadderall]

"Have you met me? Of course I have," Stiles said. "There was a point in time where all the nurses at the hospital knew my name 'cause I was in there so often."

[justlurkinghere]

Derek rolled his eyes, carefully picking up each piece of thrown popcorn. "...why is he shoving a screwdriver in the cast?"

Look, casts were a mystery to him.

[robinonadderall]

"They tend to itch after a while 'cause all the dead skin is trying to come off." Gross. "I used to use pencils and once the eraser popped off in my cast and I couldn't get it out."

[justlurkinghere]

"...that's disgusting."

And now he was so glad to be a werewolf.

[robinonadderall]

"You don't know the half of it," Stiles said. "You can't wash the thing so it begins to smell like dead skin and then when it comes off your arm is all pale and gross with dead skin coming off."

[justlurkinghere]

Derek looked from him to the popcorn. "Stop talking."

[robinonadderall]

"Oh are you enthralled with your twin's thrilling rodeo clown story?" Stiles asked. "I bet you his brother is involved in the town conspiracy."

[justlurkinghere]

The look Derek shot him about mentioning siblings was poisonous.

"He's not as muscular as me."

[robinonadderall]

Stiles threw more popcorn at Derek for being a baby and giving him that look. "He looks the same to me."

[justlurkinghere]

"Well, he's not." Derek took pride in his muscles, thank you. "His friend is going to die."

[robinonadderall]

"He should have just given up his hat," he said. "This dude's girlfriend just needs to dump his sorry ass. Why you would date a rodeo clown in the first place..."

[justlurkinghere]

"He's good looking," Derek said defensively.

[robinonadderall]

"So you're admitting he looks like you?" Stiles asked.

[justlurkinghere]

"Are you saying I'm good looking?" They could play this game all night.

[robinonadderall]

"I'm secure enough to admit that you're not hideous," Stiles said. "Too bad about that sorry ass personality of yours."

[justlurkinghere]

"Better than lacking both like you," Derek shot back with a smirk. Because he was a horrible, horrible jerk.

[robinonadderall]

Enjoy having more popcorn thrown at you, Derek. "Screw you, I am charming and adorable."

[justlurkinghere]

Well, it saved him from having to take some from the bowl. Derek was soooo lazy.

"To who?"

[robinonadderall]

"I could bring up several examples," Stiles said. "I just don't feel like it at the moment."