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Stiles woke up dazed and feeling sick to his stomach early in the morning, while it was still dark. It had taken some time to really believe that he was control of his body again and it wasn't some trick by the nogitsune. Eventually he began to realize that this was real and for now the threat of hurting people was shelved momentarily.

Which was when the guilt started flowing. He had killed people, a lot of people. Blown up the sheriff's station, hurt Coach, got one Derek and Chris Argent arrested and tortured Scott and the person that meant the most to him. He couldn't even call Derek himself to let him know he was back to himself, he had to get his dad to do it. He wanted to give Derek the option to never talk to him again if he wanted it.

After assuring Scott, Lydia and his father that he was okay, he holed himself up in his room. He had already made a decision on how to keep everyone safe from himself, he just needed to set everything up. He knew people weren't going to be happy about it, but it was the best he could come up with.

[NFB due to distance and for one!]

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"How..." Stiles pressed his lips together like he was thinking about whether or not he wanted to bring this up. "How did you get out of the basement?"

"I howled. Jack came." See how nice a pack was?

Stiles frowned, hating himself all over again for that. "Did you tell him what was happening to me?"

"I told him about the nogitsune," Derek muttered. "He promised to look into it there. See if he can't find anything to help us."

Edited 2014-06-04 01:51 (UTC)

He nodded again. "I'm sorry. For that...and for talking to Peter last summer too."

So he was going to confirm that was true, yeah.

Derek went tense, heartbeat speeding up as that sunk in.

"I was going to tell you."

"You didn't have to, it wasn't any of my business," he said, moving to slide off of Derek. He didn't want Derek to feel awkward by that while they were talking about this. "It doesn't matter."

Something dropped out in Derek's chest as he watched Stiles pull away. He forced himself to stay still, not follow as he looked down at the sheets instead.

This was going about as well as Stiles expected. "What he said after--that wasn't true. I didn't say anything to you because I didn't want to force you to share something you didn't want to."

It was all the trauma! ALL OF IT.

"What else do you already know?"

"He just told me what happened to turn your eyes blue," Stiles said. "I didn't even ask for that, he just launched right into it."

Derek nodded, eyes cast downward again. "Alright."

He stifled the useless rage at having his life torn open like some sort of lurid soap opera for everyone to know. And the feeling of betrayal. Because this wasn't quite close to what real betrayal felt like.

"I'm sorry," he said again, a little more quietly. He wasn't touching Derek at all now even though he wanted to.

Derek tugged at the corner of a pillow, not sure what to do now. "I can go if it makes you uncomfortable."

"I'm not uncomfortable," he said. "And I don't want you to go."

Derek looked over at him, obviously not certain of that being true even with his heart beat.

"Alright," he settled on neutrally. "I was going to tell you. You deserved to know what you're getting involved with."

The kind that didn't need to be possessed or controlled to kill an innocent girl.

"It wouldn't have changed my mind about you, Derek," Stiles said. "It didn't change my mind."

"Then why are you over there?" Derek snapped, giving into the urge to pull his knees up against his chest.

"I thought--" Stiles had a take a second to collect himself 'cause, wow, way to snap at him. "--I didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Well I'm uncomfortable with you over there." Derek was a pro at channeling his panic into healthy anger.

"You could have done or said something to indicate that," Stiles said even as he was moving close again.

"Can I--" Derek hesitated, hands out like he'd been going to grab Stiles.

"Yeah," he said with a nod. "You don't have to ask."

Derek pulled him in, holding onto Stiles like he was a teddy bear. "I'm sorry."

For, you know, causing the possession thanks to his re-powering the nemeton.

"You haven't done anything," he said, putting his arms around Derek. "There's nothing to be sorry for."

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